marriage lesson #1

If I have any gaps in my knowledge of what marriage is all about, it seems that I've just been introduced to one of them.

Spencer has Crohn's Disease, as you may or may not know. He was diagnosed last September, and it is a disease where our immune system thinks your small intestine/colon is sick and attacks it for no good reason. No one really knows what causes Crohn's, and we've been lucky to meet with some great GI docs and others who have really been guides for us through all of this.

Unfortunately, it hasn't been an easy road back to normal life. Spence has lost a lot of weight in the last few months, and has had some pain on and off. And to top it all off, this past Monday, Spencer was admitted to the hospital because of a fistula. In my very limited medical talk, a fistula is basically a fusion between, in Spencer's case, the latter part of the small intestine and the bladder. This has led to an infection, the need for antibiotics, and as we know now, a required surgery to remove the damaged intestine and sew up the hole in his bladder.

Now, I'm the one who convinced him to come into the hospital on Monday night. He had a high fever, and I just felt that it couldn't wait for a doctor's appointment the next day. I honestly thought that we'd go in, they'd find a kidney infection or something, and that we'd be out of there with antibiotics in no time. But after a few hours turned into him being admitted, I had to rewire my brain and realize that I am not really just the concerned girlfriend anymore. I've said yes to marriage, and that means I'm saying yes to staying by his side, and being a part of these decisions.

This surgery will be a good thing. It has a great chance of improving his quality of life. He'll be miserable for a few days afterward, but it's highly likely that we will both be able to go back to a more active and more positive way of life.

Today, someone said that this is the beginning of my wife training. Yikes, being a wife feels like my body is going into surgery, too. It feels like crap when I go home for a few hours of sleep every night, and it seems that if I left half of myself behind. I've learned more about love and commitment in the last few days than I have in months. It's incredible.

If you can keep us in your prayers tomorrow, that would be so great. We have faith that God is providing for us. In fact, Spencer was supposed to go to Utah on Sunday night, and his flight got canceled. Who knows what would have happened if he had gone, but the Lord is surely protecting him.